A Therapy Blog About Boundaries, Trauma & Being Human

If you've ever said yes to something, felt your stomach drop the second the word left your mouth, and spent the next three days dreading the follow-through — you already know the behavior. What's harder to trace is where it came from. Because people pleasing isn't a personality flaw. It's not a bad habit you picked up from a self-help book you read wrong. And it's definitely not just about being "too nice." Being nice is an adaptive survival strategy. The problem is that your

You said it. You actually said it. You told your mom that you weren't going to be available every time she called in a panic. You told your friend that you couldn't keep being the person she processed every relationship crisis with at 11pm. You used calm language. You picked a good moment. You didn't apologize mid-sentence (okay, maybe once, but you caught yourself). And then you hung up the phone and felt... worse. More anxious, not less. Like you'd done something wrong. Lik

A therapist's honest answer, which is more complicated, and more hopeful, than most of what you'll find online. Most people people wondering " how do I know if I'm a people pleaser?" have already been sitting with it for a while. They've read the listicles. They vaguely recognize themselves. What they're really asking is: is this actually a problem, or am I just a considerate person? That's the right question. And the answer is genuinely more nuanced than most of the interne

I was in therapy for years before I became a therapist. I loved my therapist. Thought they were so cool. Genuinely wanted them to think I was cool too. I had cathartic moments. I felt validated. I grew (a little). And I was a good client in the most literal sense: I'd scan my week looking for what might be worth bringing in, which, honestly, isn't a bad habit. It helps people make the most of their sessions. But underneath that diligence was something I couldn't see at the ti

Everyone told you the hard part was deciding to stop people pleasing. Set the boundary. Say the no. Prioritize yourself. Simple, right? Except you did those things. Or you're trying to. And somehow what happens when you stop people pleasing doesn't feel like a massive sign of relief. Instead you're oscillating between grief and exhaustion. This, my friend, is the messy middle of people pleasing recovery. I want to be real with you about the whole journey, messy middle inclu

What I Noticed as a Trauma Therapist at Baby Swim Class The water has always been my happy place. (Middle school AIM screen name: beachbab3209, if that tells you anything.) So when my baby turned 8 months, I was ridiculously excited to start swim lessons. Honestly, I’ve probably been more into it than they are. They’re still mostly a smiley, curious potato, so I’ll own that I’m bringing 95% of the hype. But in our latest lesson, I found myself whispering to my friend (also t

My Favorite Local Spots: Fall 2025 Edition When people search for a trauma therapist in Baltimore , they’re often looking for relief, grounding, and a sense of safety — but healing doesn’t begin and end in a therapy room. The spaces we move through every day have just as much impact on our nervous system as the conversations we have in session. Sometimes, the most powerful parts of healing happen on a park bench, in a quiet bookstore, or while sipping a warm drink in a cozy c

My Favorite Local Spots: Summer 2025 Edition When people search for “therapy in Baltimore,” they often seek ways to feel grounded, connected, and supported. However, therapy doesn’t only happen in an office. The places we spend our time can significantly impact our well-being. Part of healing is discovering environments that bring us comfort, spark joy, or help us slow down. As both a therapist and a Baltimore local, I want to share some of my favorite spots in the city. Thes

For people pleasers, when taking care of everyone else stops working... At what point does it shift from a quarter-life crisis to a...

For the people-pleaser waking up to what you really want... Rarely do things feel simple, straightforward or easeful when you're in the...

Ever find yourself agreeing to something — a favor, a dinner, a weekend trip — and the second the word “yes” leaves your mouth, your...

What therapy for people-pleasers actually looks like—and how it helps you stop shape-shifting without burning everything down.

What somatic therapy is, how it works, and why it helps people-pleasers, perfectionists, and burnout-prone bodies feel safe again.

Step-by-step guide to finding a somatic therapist for people-pleasers in Maryland—without the overwhelm.