Especially if you're overwhelmed, burned out, or just not sure where to start

Person reading a book on a bed with white sheets, wearing brown socks. A cup of coffee, pen, and warm glowing lights set a cozy mood.

So you’ve decided to look for a therapist. That alone deserves a gold star, a nap, and maybe a snack.

But then you open a therapy directory or search “therapists near me,” and suddenly you’re drowning in headshots, jargon, and way too many tabs.

If you’ve ever thought, “I know I need help, but I have no idea where to start,” this guide’s for you.

I’m a somatic therapist based in Baltimore, Maryland, working with people-pleasers and highly sensitive folks who want to stop running on autopilot and start feeling like themselves again.

Before You Start:

You don’t have to feel "ready." You don’t need a perfect plan. You just need enough clarity to take one tiny next step—and this guide will help with that.

Step 1: You Don’t Need a Perfect Reason—But Let’s Start with a Few Questions

You don’t need the perfect elevator pitch for your pain. Try starting with:

What’s been feeling hard lately?
What kind of support do you not want?
Would you prefer someone warm and affirming, or more structured and direct?
Is body-based (somatic) work something you’re curious about?

A therapist doesn’t need you to have it all figured out—they just need a thread to follow with you.

Step 2: Use the Right Tools for You

Some options:

Psychology Today: The big, searchable one. Filter-heavy, but can be overwhelming.
TherapyDen: More inclusive, with values-aligned filters.
Open Path: Lower-fee therapy options.
Local directories or word of mouth: Sometimes the best referrals come from a friend or a random post in a Facebook group.

Yes, people are even asking ChatGPT for help now. You can literally type: "I’m looking for a somatic therapist for burnout and people-pleasing in Baltimore"—and it may just point you toward someone like me.

If you're searching for therapy in Maryland or need a somatic therapist for people-pleasers, these tools can help you get started.

Step 3: Do your research

If someone catches your eye, do a little light internet sleuthing. Check out their website, instagram, or blog. See how they talk about therapy. Do they seem grounded? Funny? Direct? Soft?

You don’t need to stalk their entire digital footprint—but getting a feel for how they show up online can help you sense if they’re grounded, warm, nerdy, irreverent, structured, soft, or something else entirely.

Pay attention to how you feel while reading their content. Curious? Relieved? A little teary? That’s good info.

And if their profile is super bare-bones and you’re still unsure? Trust your gut. You’re allowed to book a consult just to get a feel—or keep scrolling until someone feels like a clearer fit.

Step 4: Send the Awkward Email (or Use the Contact Form)

It doesn’t have to be perfect. You can literally copy/paste this:

Hi, I’m looking for a therapist and your profile caught my eye. I’m hoping to work on [insert a few words—burnout, boundaries, stress, etc.]. I wasn’t sure if you’re currently accepting new clients, but I’d love to learn more. Thanks!

You can ask about fit, sliding scale, or anything else in a consult. You're not committing to anything yet.

Step 5: Pay Attention to How You Feel After a Consult

Therapist fit is more about how you feel after a conversation than checking off boxes. Do you feel seen? Do you feel safe enough to be a little messy?

It’s okay to shop around. You’re allowed to say no. And you don’t need to apologize for wanting the right kind of support.

Quick Summary: How to Find a Therapist

Just need the basics? Here's your 30-second recap.

✅ I wrote down 1–2 things I want support with

✅ I checked out a few therapist bios that felt promising

✅ I reminded myself I don’t have to pick the “perfect” person

✅ I took one small action—like bookmarking someone or sending an email

Even one ✅ is enough. You’re doing great.

Frequently Asked Questions

I keep putting off contacting someone. Is that normal? Yes. A lot of people delay reaching out—not because they don’t want help, but because they’re overwhelmed, afraid of picking the wrong person, or just plain exhausted. Start small: bookmark a few profiles, copy a message template, or talk it through with someone you trust.

What if I don’t know how to “do” therapy? You’re not expected to show up with a full narrative or healing plan. Your therapist is trained to help you start where you are—even if you just say, “I’m not sure why I’m here, but something’s off.”

I’ve had bad experiences with therapy before. How can I try again? That’s valid, and it makes sense to be cautious. If something didn’t work before, it doesn’t mean therapy can’t help—it just means that therapist or method wasn’t right for you. Look for someone whose approach is collaborative, trauma-informed, or explicitly somatic if that feels safer to your system.

I’m a people-pleaser—what if I just end up trying to “perform” in therapy too? This is so real. The good news is: the right therapist will help you notice that pattern, not punish you for it. Therapy isn’t about getting it right—it’s about getting honest, even when that feels messy or vulnerable.

How do I know if a therapist is the right fit? Pay attention to how you feel after a consult. Do you feel heard? A little more hopeful? That’s often a good sign.

What should I say in a first message to a therapist? Keep it simple. Share 1–2 things you’re hoping to work on and ask if they’re accepting new clients.

What if I don’t live in Maryland? Many therapists offer virtual sessions, but make sure they’re licensed in your state. If you’re not looking for therapy in Maryland, you can still use these tips to guide your search.

What kind of therapist should I look for if I’m a people-pleaser or constantly burnt out? Look for someone who specializes in boundaries, burnout, somatic therapy, or people-pleasing patterns. Somatic therapists can help you tune into your body’s cues instead of overriding them.

Erin sitting in a wicker chair. Her legs are crossed, she has a book open in her lap, and she is smiling looking at the camera.

P.S. I’m a somatic therapist in Maryland who works with overwhelmed people-pleasers (hi, I see you). If you're in Maryland and looking for someone who blends honesty, softness, and body-based tools to help you find your voice again—you can reach out here or schedule a consult.

Or if you’re still figuring out what your body wants from therapy, you can start with this somatic trigger tracker to help you listen in.

How to Find a Therapist (without spiraling)